Introduction

Parenting is hard work, and parenting a child who struggles in school and may have social and emotional difficulties arising from his school problems is even harder work. Homework, keeping organized, and even daily tasks like getting ready for school and helping out at home can be more difficult for children who cannot read their own handwriting, who struggle to keep track of time, or who have attention issues.

There can also be financial pressures. Even with the extensive help provided by the special education system, many families find themselves paying for evaluations, therapists, special schools and summer camps and other items that their school district will not – or cannot -- provide. These expenses can be a substantial burden for any family.

Still another stressful aspect of life for parents of children with learning issues is the need to be your child’s advocate. While some parents find that their school system is a real partner in working towards what is best for their child, others find themselves in frequent conflict with a system that is not responsive to their child’s needs.

We have found a few simple steps to make things easier for ourselves and our children

• Keep records of everything – evaluations, CSE notices, and IEPs. Keep logs of telephone calls with school personnel, noting whom you spoke to and when and what they promised to do. Keep copies of your child’s school work, both so you can share your concerns with others and so you can take pleasure in your child’s improvements over time.
• Keep your cool. There will be times when you will be overwhelmed with frustration at school personnel. Try to remember that being polite and calm does not mean that you are not being assertive. It just makes you more effective.
• And follow the advice of one young man we know, whose reply when his frustrated parents ask, “What are we going to do with you?” is always the same. “Keep me and love me.” And they do.